Eternal Love

For the past few days, I've been busy scanning and touching up some of my Dad's old photos. Mom has been asking me to do this for ages. She wants to have them re-print. But I have been coming up with lots of excuses. Hehe.. But since I'm leaving for LA in about two weeks, I've decided to oblige. There's a reason why I've been avoiding her request. Ever since Dad passed away, I've been trying to block that fateful day from my mind. Coz everytime I think about it, I will feel the same feelings washing me all over again. The shock, the sadness, that lost and longing feelings. :((

True enough..as I was scannng the photos, the memories came back. Tears fell down without me realizing it. Most of all, I realized that somehow I've forgotten his distinct features. Yeah, sure I remember how he looked like..but those details..the sweet smile that started from his eyes..I've been avoiding those details. Then I realized that I've forgotten how he smelled and how he sounded like!!! I feel terrible, as if my forgetting all the details means that I don't love him anymore when in fact I still do! God..I still talk to him, especially when I'm all alone, driving in my car. Sounds crazy eh?

But my feelings can't compare to Mom's. She and Dad are truly soul-mates. They have been together ever since they first laid their eyes on each other about 45 years ago. 29th July 2008 was supposed to be their 43 years wedding anniversary. Dad's death came as big shock to all of us. He was in perfect health when he left the house. Nobody would have expected that he would come home in a hearse. For the first few months, everybody was living in a state of denial.

Mom is practically living in the past. She spends her time looking at Dad's old pictures, reading their old love letters. She even listens to the "Klasik' radio station constantly because that channel always air the songs during her and Dad's younger days. Mind you, ever since Dad died, Mom has been reciting Surah Yasin for him every single day. And she has completed reading Al-Quran for about 4 or 5 times and dedicate the barakah to Dad.


Mom and Dad during their 1st year wedding anniversary


Mom and Dad were meant for each other

When Zul and I first got married, I asked him what kind of a wife did he expect of me. He simply answered, "I want you to be just like Mom." I understood then that Mom is anything that a husband wants. She's beautiful, she loves Dad whole-heartedly, respects and obeys him, and she never raises her voice to Dad...as far as I can remember, not even once. She's very loyal to Dad. She's a great cook and Dad and the children are all that matters to her.

Life has never been the same for Mom ever since Dad passed away. She has lost a lover, a partner, a companion and a friend. Yesterday, it has been exactly four years in Muslim calendar. I still see the tears welling in her eyes everytime somebody talks about Dad. And she still cries hard everytime we go back to Dad's hometown. It's harder for her because my uncle (Dad's younger brother) is looking more and more like Dad! I myself feel like hugging and kissing him. Hehe...

Nowadays, a lot of people are taking love and marriage for granted. We hear about divorces, infidelities...almost all the time. But I'm glad to have the best example in front of me. Sure..life is not always a bed of roses...lots of ups and downs. But Mom and Dad has shown to me and Zul that eternal love is not a fairy tale. It does exist, and it is up to us to make it a reality.